Post by Fenny
One of the things I've missed most about not driving to and from work
is not hearing either the Media Show or Steve's discussions with Eddie
on PM. I rarely listen to PM now, but got home a bit early and put it
on this evening.
The chats have all been available as podcasts, very moving.
Post by Fenny
My friend, my colleague and a great broadcaster Steve Hewlett has died.
I visited him in hospital a few days ago and wrote this knowing that I would almost certainly never see him again.
His family said it brought him and them some comfort so I'm sharing it in the hope it may help others - old friends and the many new ones who never met him but felt they knew him
One last conversation
So much to say.
So little actually said.
But the pills, the piles of sympathetic letters, the constant flow of visitors said it all
We chat, we gossip, we exchange insights about our shared world.
I'm too British, too male, too stiff upper-lipped to really talk about the fact that it's a world you and I both know you'll soon be leaving
To talk about the fact that your "battle" is almost at an end
You "fought" they said.
You've been so "brave" they said
Yet you know, I know, anyone who has faced it knows differently
Cancer is not a battle.
There is no choice whether to fight let alone whether to win or lose.
No amount of courage no measure of cowardice can decide the outcome.
There is no virtue in survival. Certainly no lack of it in death.
You now know that you will not.
Luck. Chance. Fate. Nothing more. Nothing less.
You didn't ...couldn't choose
You didn't ...couldn't decide.
Save, that is, for one thing.
You chose to confront your sickness, your pain, your fear in public
Your decision made thousands realise they were not alone
That really was brave. That a choice that let others know that their sickness, their pain and their fear was not, in fact, just theirs
That one last conversation which was so very worthwhile having.
As I leave you gripped my arm. An unspoken goodbye.
Only now do I know what I should have said.
No one who heard you talk about what you've faced will ever forget
Oh yes and one more thing.