Post by Chris McMillan
A stranger knocked at our door at tea time yesterday saying he has a cat.
He lives in the road behind our garden but further down. I said I’d not
seen any cats here for some time. He said he’d got the cat, it was at home
when he arrived from work - it was the electronic collar tag!
He’d been in our friend and neighbour’s garden and heard it warbling. But
it couldn’t locate which of three gardens in our road as the garden
boundaries are somewhat staggered. Turned out it was the next house down
from us! I wonder what he said to his (oh so clever cat!) on his return.
I'm reminded of a story from The News Quiz, I think the original can be
found here <https://www.bbc.co.uk/sounds/play/b09c4xvs>, my version will
have been altered by time and senility.
A vicar was visiting a family and found them clustered around a tree
trying to entice their cat down. The tree was a mere sapling, tall,
slender and whippy, but not strong enough to support the weight of an
adult wanting to climb it and retrieve the cat.
No problem said the vicar, we'll attach a rope to the tree at
head-height and the other end to the rear of my car. If I drive gently
away the tree will bend over towards it and you can reach up and lift
off the cat.
This plan was no sooner said than put into practice and the vehicle was
being slowly driven away when disaster struck and the rope came undone.
The tree shot back up into a vertical position and the cat could not be
A few days later, on another parochial visit, the vicar remarked that he
didn't know the family had a cat. "Oh we didn't" said the father, we
were sitting out on the lawn when my daughter said that she wished we
had a cat. No sooner were the words out of her mouth when her prayers
were answered, a miracle happened, and this cat dropped out of the sky
and it's been with us ever since.